Why didn’t anyone warn me?

This is hard.

As a mom I’m frequently feeling like I’m on the brink of failing and today has been no different.

Its 1:00 and I haven’t showered. I’ve battled my son on so many little things I couldn’t list them all. He’s hit me at least twice and I’m embarrassed to say how often I’ve gotten frustrated with him. I’m struggling to get the housework done before my husband gets home but feel guilty that I haven’t engaged with my son in any meaningful activity because I’ve been so preoccupied with the house. All I’ve had is coffee and cheezits and I feel guilt over the lack of nutrition that provides my unborn daughter. I’m starting a new job next week and haven’t been able to successfully login to their payroll system despite multiple contacts with HR. I’m failing at it all it seems.

All of this leaves me near tears. This is so hard. I want to just cry and take a nap and run away when my husband gets home from work. But that’s not reality. And soon enough I’ll have two littles to juggle, more time at home and an unpredictable work schedule. It’s not looking easier my friends.

Yet I look around and although I may not feel it right now I know I’m blessed. I’m blessed to have girlfriends that just pop by to drop off things for me. I’m blessed to have parents who are willing and eager to watch my son so my husband and I can have a date. I’m blessed to be in a position to stay home more and a husband that not only financially supports that decision but is emotionally backing me. I’m blessed to get to have these days with my son and to know that after nap we can start fresh and play.

So if you’re in the slums and feeling like you’re failing I’m hear to tell you – you’re not. You’re making it through another day. You’re doing the best that you can and you’re striving for more. Kuddos to you mama.

Xoxo

Gwen

#honestmothering #realmothering #momtruth #unfilteredmom #toddlermom #workingmom #momlife

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